The Terrifying World of the X ChromosomeGloria went to have lunch with one of her best friends last week. “I took her some scented soap,” she said, “rosemary mint,” she pauses, preparing to blow me away, “and then—she gave me some, too! White tea and ginger!”
“Wow!” I said. “The X-Chromosome: Unfathomably Strange. A twelve-part documentary.”
“Oh, and I gave her a card for her and Julio’s anniversary.”
“So it’s come to this,” I said. “Now women are giving each other cards about their anniversaries with other people.”
“Well, she gave me one last year,” Gloria said.
“She gave you a card for our anniversary?” I asked. “Who ARE you people?”
“You’re just jealous,” she said.
“Yes, I am,” I said. “I long to spend half an hour a day picking out greeting cards and smelling soap.”
“Watch it,” she said. “I’ll have a grilling party and invite all our friends.”
"If they’re really my friends, they won’t come,” I said.