Monday, February 08, 2016

Ugh

I've watched all fifty Super Bowls live, and that was the worst Super Bowl I've ever seen.

It's getting more difficult to watch the Super Bowl these days. CBS wasn't covering a football game.

They were covering a brand.

Let me explain.

I was sitting on the couch with Eli 14. 6 and they were talking about the quarterbacks as Denver received the opening kickoff.

I knew what was about to happen.

"They're not going to mention any of Peyton Manning's statistics this season," I said.

Sure enough, they talked all about his career records, etc. But he was the worst starting quarterback--statistically--in the NFL this season, and did they mention that? Of course not, because the NFL has positioned Peyton Manning as an important part of their brand.

Never tarnish "the shield", as they say.

So when the corpse of Peyton Manning was lobbing water balloons fifteen yards down the field, CBS never mentioned the strange lack of velocity, or how the Denver offense can shutter a large part of their playbook because he can't make most of the throws anymore.

That's interesting, though--the story of a once-great quarterback reduced to a fragile shell, struggling to survive on guile, and coaches changing their game plan because of his greatly diminished skills. It's too bad that it wasn't mentioned.

Actually, I think Manning is probably the worst quarterback ever to win a Super Bowl. Not based on his career, obviously, because you can make a case that--at a minimum--he's one of the top five quarterbacks in history. Based solely on this season, though, he had the worst statistical season of any quarterback to start in the Super Bowl, and he was no better yesterday.

Denver, though, had possibly the most dominant defense I've ever seen. Manning could have taken every snap and kneeled, and the game still would have been close.

If you're wondering about the second-worst Super Bowl I've ever watched, it was Super Bowl V. 16-13, Colts over Cowboys. Eleven turnovers. It was wildly bad, although I will say it was far more entertaining than yesterday. The ball seemed to come loose about every third play (here's a drive-by-drive summary).

If you have a few hours to kill, here's the entire game, including commercials. If you watch the full game, you'll have a hard time believing any of it actually happened when it's over. That's how bizarre it was, and eleven turnovers doesn't even begin to describe the craziness.

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